We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy.

A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner. Kids, kids. I’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Kids, kids. I’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Slow down, Bart! My legs… Continue reading We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy.

I don’t understand the question, and I won’t respond to it

What’s Spanish for “I know you speak English?” First place chick is hot, but has an attitude, doesn’t date magicians. There’s only one man I’ve ever called a coward, and that’s Brian Doyle Murray. No, what I’m calling you is a television actor. Michael! Marry me. I don’t criticize you! And if you’re worried about… Continue reading I don’t understand the question, and I won’t respond to it